Nobody gets my ideas. A world made of tits which is unvisitable unless we cross non-euclidean dimensions of madness giving rise to tit-teeth. It just makes so much damn sense that I'm surprised someone hasn't been given the go-ahead for a CGI-intensive porno version of "Event Horizon". Call it "Event Thighs-Open", everyone's on the way to a big space gangbang when the FTL malfunctions and they find themselves transported to a sexy universe of horrors in which they are the freaks. They find solace in each other, the only 'normal' people left. Threesomes and exploratory cgi-sex abound. Two guys getting blowjobs from one girl's tits with mouths on them. We could make it horror and give them teeth. I mean come on, people, the script just writes itself!
Okay, fine, my sights are set too high, okay. Here, I'll ask for some reader interaction:
Someone photoshop me a pic of a topless chick, body in profile, face 3/4, with a confused look, and her nipple replaced by the lolwut teeth. (You know, like you normally see on the pear). The body can be in 3/4 as well, in fact it'd probably look better that way. Both nipples, then, and the smoother and less shoppy the seam appears, and the more comically non-human the teeth/mouth are, the better. I'd honestly like it to look very remarkably like the lolwut pear(s), just fleshy and on a chick. NowutImean?
Free* beer for the winner.
*free meaning I'll pay you one sixpack of any beer you can buy in six packs in your region, limit $20, if you accept paypal, or up to 6 drinks in the local bar of your choice, max $30+, depending on how much I myself drink. No, you don't have to sit there with me, I'll be busy chortling over the picture for a good two hours.
A truly infinite existence means everything you can imagine is everywhere. So right now I just created a world comprised entirely of tits.
It's claimed by some that faster than light travel is impossible without breaking a few 'fundamental' physics laws. One way involves travel through 'realms of unimaginable chaos' which no one can pass through wholly sane.
So. The tits shall construct such a drive, and they shall come to us, called as they are by the unconscious yearnings of the multiverse of tit-obsessed men-child living here on earth.
And they'll come with teeth. And penises. And spikes. And weapons. Massive malevolent Tyrannosaur Tits with gun-turret nipples. They shall lay waste to our world simply trying to say hello.
So, the next time you want to say hello to a girl by motorboating her... THINK of the titmonster horror you are trying to unleash on our world.
Dreams really bug me when they start getting realistic enough that I can't distinguish the events that happen therein from real life. So this week I've spent a day or two thinking I had sex with someone I hadn't, and that I've gone places with people I interact with regularly, thus requiring me to keep telling myself "no, you did not go into the countryside with them yesterday, you did not see old buildings, and you did not get abandoned in banjo country. Stop staring, they're looking at you funny."
I don't have wet dreams like normal people, I have strange pseudo-abandonment things and 'cinematic' tricks hiding all the 'good stuff' and in-dream hours of self-recrimination and wishing I could remember how good it was.
At least when I drink heavily the dreams are interesting, sure, I can't remember most of them, but those bits that do stick through sure make me wonder what I missed. By the way, you're welcome for saving you all from the cataclysmic impact of a moonlett made entirely of bees by attaching the Hindenburg to it, poking a hole in the back, and lighting the exhaust to cause it to rocket away and explode. I'm pretty sure I would have celebrated, but I was actually a conglomeration of geckos held together Voltron-style by the needs of the moment, and we all scurried away when the sky lit up with bee-light.
You see? I'd pay good money to see that on a screen. Free tabs of LSD with every tub of popcorn, come on in and enjoy. Don't worry, the seats are not upholstered specifically so you can shit yourself as the director comes from the fifth dimension 'under' the screen to eat your leg hairs because they are now made of nummy nummy gummi. Please leave all unconsumed drugs with the manatee on your way out/in/through/Paris.
So boss of the company died of brain cancer last week. Hard way to go, you'd think, but it was really quick. It was a real blow to lose him, though. He cut me a lot of slack and helped point me towards ways of being human that I had missed. Not quite there, but am much closer. I'll have to redouble my efforts because I get the feeling all that slack is counted against me. Yesterday they had the service. It was the first funeral I attended in over a decade, and the first one where I cared so much for the deceased. Most people I talk to/associate with got a bit irritated that we got the funeral with a heaping helping of Jesus on Jesus with a side of Jesus, sprinkled with a heavy dash of guilt and pressure. Well, that's the modern Christian for ya, I guess. Big churches, hefty-priced A/V systems, wireless mike sets, and hot and cold running "believe or burn" pressure. Boss wasn't like that, or like many 'loud' Christians. He exemplified the faith and the intention behind it, and lived it to the hilt. If you needed, he gave, if you questioned, he explained, if you were difficult, he was patient and firm, simple as that. I wish I had known him longer.
After that and after work, as well as part of today, I played a round of Errand Boy: The Karma-ing to make sure sarracenia doesn't keel over and bleed out. We make light of the situation, but I'm keeping the phone close and reminding myself not to konk her over the head and drag her to the ER. The list of 'People I'd Break Commitments and Laws to Get Beside in a Pinch' is a bit longer than most people realize, myself included. I don't relish the thought of making those kinds of choices, though I don't shirk from them or the consequences. Thankfully the list of 'People I'd Commit Felonies For' remains short and untested.
Oh... uh... mostly untested.
So yeah, universe can stop screwing with mah peoples now.
If I haven't raved about TED.com, then I've done you a disservice. TED.com is basically the best minds of our world coming together to give relatively short talks on a huge variety of topics, themes, and directions. Now when I say 'best minds' I mean Stephen Hawking, Al Gore, Jane Goodall, Tony Robbins, and hundreds and hundreds of other people against whom the national media has committed the terrible crime of not bringing them more to the forefront of our society.
TED is a nonprofit organization that asks important and highly intelligent people to speak about issues important to them and tell us about the things they're doing. I've seen information about global warming, climate change, education, how we work, how we play, how we communicate, how we think, how we relate, and how violently we don't do it anymore. I've heard one man say that the oceans are dying, literally at deaths door and showing spasmodic signs of it in blooms, massive die-offs and dead zones, and disappearing complexity. I've heard another man say that his company is moving already in other smaller countries and the state of Hawaii to bring electric zero-emission vehicles charging off a power grid based wholly on wind, solar, and wave power and that they're poised to give at least part of the world if not all of the world an 8-cent-per-mile car, when the petroleum industry is at 18 cents and rising fast. I've heard the man in charge of the team that mapped the human genome saying that within 10-15 years we could have home-grown biotech leading to a culturally-driven overhaul of the biological engineering 'business' like the home computer led to the modern e-commerce. Another tells of how he's making energy with robotically flown kites, another shows how biotech can have enzymes convert excess CO2 to methane on demand, Al Gore showed us that that is already happening naturally and NO, not in a good way.
You can shove a stick in the ice pack in the north pole in various areas and light it with a lighter as if it were a torch, and it will burn.
Now, one thing that hasn't been brought together are these ideas, and I think that the time is ripe and it's necessary to do so for at least some of them. Wind power generation (see the talk about kites) is still coming into it's own and will be for a good while, so while we work on harnessing that and effectively making solar more sustainable as well, we can take advantage of this natural hydrocarbon generation that is going on as a result of our unintentional release of carbon into the atmosphere by using the offshoot result of rapid plant growth to engineer and create plants and enzymes that produce usable fuel like methane. Another would be a large push for a genetic mapping of existing creatures that are in danger or those like them, and then eventual re-engineering and recreation of that lost biodiversity. Now that's a really scary idea, and probably not one we want to think about, but the biodome projects are showing us that we can build it, and they will come.
Other projects such as completely outlawing fishing in a region of Denmark and the unintentional no-human zone of Chernobyl show that the fish back within a few seasons to the oceans and that wild animals thought to be extinct in the Chernobyl region are showing up again, breeding rapidly enough and large enough to overcome the increased mortality and mutation rates, and generally getting along well enough without us. Nobody's really talked about Chernobyl in the TED talks I've found, probably because nobody wants to give a bioterrorism group the obvious idea of "bears can't read geiger counters".
Then of course projects come in with ideas for space. How we're working on it, what needs to be done with it, how we can mine areas of it, etc etc etc. There IS water on the moon, there is cheap and easy energy on the moon, there is water on Mars, there is water on Europa, there is enough methane on Titan to completely ignite it from a rogue spark, so obviously we could use that to power the Earth for the foreseeable FOREVER, and that's NOT counting the source of all energy in the solar system in every form which is the sun, and not counting the incredible winds of Jupiter and the gasses boiling around within it.
TED talks about all of this, or at least most of it, and they think big, small, tall, deep. They talk about the largest trees in the world, the Sequoias, and the insects and creatures that live in the trees and nowhere else on the planet at all. They talk about the deepest caves in the world in Mexico, how they're mapping them, and how the devices they create to map them are going to be used fairly shortly to start mapping the waters of Europa. They talk about why humans hope, why we dream, why blind people dream in colors, why we need to begin studying and understanding the Muslim faith and 'Muslim world' if we expect to avert war. They talk about what's going on with countries in the future, how Africa can develop and avoid all the mistakes we made to allow themselves to kickstart their developing economies from poverty to juggernaut in decades instead of centuries, and how China and the European Union and South American trade zones will enable them to do it.
TED makes me glad to be alive now when I am, because I'm seeing pretty much the culmination of roughly 6,000 to 60,000,000 years of evolution and civilization. 10,000 years ago we began scratching the Earth to plant crops, and so doing we changed the face of the world. 5,000 years ago we created towns, cities, empires. 500 years ago we spread out to more of the continents to rediscover the world and let them rediscover the lessons lost and what we learned. 200 years ago we began to use machines. 150 years ago we began using electricity. 100 years ago we flew. 60 years ago we split atoms. 50 years ago we went to the moon. 30 years ago we created computer networks. 10 years ago we brought forth the internet. We stand on the cusp of being able to create new life, biological and mechanical. We stand ready to re-open space commercially, to power ourselves cleanly, and we do so in a time of relatively the greatest peace our species has been at in it's history. Guessing at what the next 5, 10, or 100 years will bring us is staggering, both in it's potential for success, and the potential for complete failure.
TED tells us all this. They warn us of the dangers, and show us how far we have yet to go. They also show us how far we've come, and how much more potential we can fill, and how many miracles we'll see in our lifetimes.
So far they keep saying one thing, though. We're going to have to get there together. It's not a Us vs Them thing anymore like the Cold War space race was, or like the World Wars were. It truly is a time where a mistake, or inaction, or callous disregard for our effect on our planet and each other can lead to an unrecoverable decline, and a very literal dark age for the planet and any people unfortunate enough to have to try to survive through it.
Someone with a big TV needs to host a Christopher Walken Movie Marathon for me. We could make it a drinking game. Things we must include: The Deer Hunter, Communion, King of New York, At Close Range, SOMETHING from SNL that doesn't suck (tall order). I can also see again: the Prophecy, Suicide Kings, and Pulp Fiction (even though he had a bit role, it was the Main Bit)
Someone needs to put this together quickly for me. I'll provide the blockbuster account for the movies, and maybe some popcorn. Let's get on this people.
Yes, my people, with these springs I shall bring forth a new weapon of terrible and awesome power. It shall allow us to finally launch the little yappy neighbor dog far enough that he won't find his way home again! THE SUBURBAN CLENSING SHALL BEGIN!
Al Gore wants me to call 18779REPOWER to bug my legislator about clean energy. I want to leave a message to build alliances to take advantage of the impending upheaval as countries land area shrink. I want to encourage the US to ally with strong nations such as Japan and Britain, island nations under threat, and prepare for an acquisitive land grab against their mainland brothers. The US could easily power into regions of Mexico, an area already torn at the seams and unable to defend itself, and set up a 'protectorate' regime intent on pacification and preparations for statehood(s) of the various Mexican states.
First order of business? A land war against the drug cartels. By backing and arming US gangs (particularly the more violent of the population of California prisons) and with strategic assistance from the US Armed forces, a land army of US citizens would be allowed and encouraged to pacify all opponents to US empire rule, particularly the drug lords of the region. Those that distinguish themselves can be awarded governorship of areas they claim. The American populace would vote on who would win through the internet. The potentials would post YouTube videos of their exploits and speeches. Those who can inspire and command the broken Mexican populace of their region would be better able to show it in their videos as they walk among the people.
Then, we assist Japan in the subjugation of China. China being a communist power is already vilified within our cultural psyche, so telling them that Japanese rule would be better would be an easy sell for the populace. The remaining anti-violence hardliners would be silenced as we free Tibet and Hong Kong from threat of Chinese violence. The US would assist by invading and subjugating North Korea, the only major threat to the Japanese besides the Chinese themselves. Japan would not be able to hold the entirety of China by itself, but we'd grant freedom to many of the member regions, like Mongolia, and use them as a buffer against Russia.
Russia we would deal with as a semi-equal, if they keep their place. We'd grant them the right to retake the eastern states they lost in the fall of communism and we'd offer them a warm-water port in the Mediterranean. They could be our biggest competitor, or our biggest ally.
Our main goal? Securing our continent for American interests as it shrinks. We'd make a run for Panama and build our strategic bases there. You already can't drive over the canal, we'd make sure it stays that way, and we'd control the locks (which would probably need a bit of redesigning. Sure, we'd lose some coastline, a hunk of the gulf states, a bit of California, etc, but think of how much we'd gain.
It's not like we're doing anything to really fix it now. I can assure you the farsighted among us has taken that into account and are preparing for the strife that occurs. With changing weather patterns, disturbed growing seasons, and civil unrest, the world shall become a much harder place within the next 10 years if we don't prepare to take our piece of it.
Or we can call that number and keep from having to fight Russia and Japan and Britain over the dregs of the rest of the world.
Replace "race mixing" with "homosexuality" and you could take it out of yesterday's headlines...
Well... if the news 90% of us see bothered to cover anything newsworthy, I guess.
I love how they mix together both the races without any hint of irony here. I'll bet those black leaders are sleeping like babies at night, too. Equal rights to oppress those we disagree with! Yay the American dream! Oh but don't point it out, however, oh no, that's offensive!
Huh, and when I drew the obvious similarities out to a Christian busily telling me how he knew more about what was good for other people than they did because his hypocritical pick-and-choose interpretation and following of the heavily edited and revised bible would back him up if read from a distance while squinting, he told me the two were not at all related and that I should shut up about things I know nothing about.
I know we're not supposed to judge the silent whole by the vociferous few, but the whole is remaining silent and not telling these idiots to sit down, be quiet, and perhaps learn something about the God they pretend to follow. Silence implies complicity and tacit approval, or oblivious, unquestioning obedience. So which will it be, Christians?
To be honest, I'd like to ignorantly think that this problem could have been nipped in the bud with the application of a few more lions and Romans, to discount the fact that every group big enough to claim more than 5 members has at least a 1/5 (conservatively) ratio of fuckheads to regular joes. But it wouldn't. The judgmental, holier-than-thou, nosy, gossiping, busybody, middle managers of life would gravitate to anything that allowed them to gather together and indulge their xenophobic hate and self-congratulatory preening. Wicca and Scientology spring to mind right off hand, if not about this issue than substitute one which makes each group foam at the mouth (usually expressing the opinion that they're full of it works). Further truth would be that other countries and religions are dealing with this issue, most of them much more harshly. Indeed, ours could be said to be a leader among the rights-granting nations (somewhat)...
But honestly, being the prize pig at the fair doesn't mean we're not still mired in our own shit, and saying everyone else does it stopped being an adequate excuse around, say, about the time our mothers trotted out the bridge analogy.
It's past time to grow up, people. Your life isn't affected in the least by these people getting married, end of story, shut up, go home, turn on the Price is Right or whatever, and work on pulling the stick out.
“This message said him for West(?). So I can get the proper emphasis out pre reduce your volume at this time. Now you've done that. If you are guest or hard of hearing get a ladder ___. Thank you.”
I hope that when I get some debilitating thing that must be removed from my body that I can keep it and make an action figure out of it. Like a tumor. I shall keep it and keep it alive (possible per google), put a face on it's jar, and punish it for perceived transgressions or just because I can. Bad day at work? 50k volts to the tumor. Bad sexual experience? hot poker to the tumor. Fired and running out of food? Whore out the tumor.
It's like having kids or pets without CPS or the SPCA nosing around and blathering on about how they're a life form. There is no tumor advocacy group. Everyone's pretty universally anti-tumor. There's no downside, except you can't make it mow the lawn.
And so dawns another day in which I do unspeakable things to myself and hopefully am not made to wear pants by you stodgy conservative nuts. It's not entirely my fault. I've fallen into rote by the forces of the Job and the fact that my window opens to the east. I get a faceful of sunkakke every morning, and the cats threaten my liver if I don't feed them soon after that.
Still, I luxuriate in a day off. I plan to seize it by doing as little as possible (for the moment), and perhaps some other things I won't mention, else they won't come true. See how that works out?
the KLR 650 is a single cylinder, 651 cc, liquid cooled, five gear, 400lb dual sport motorcycle, holding 6.1/5.6 claimed/actual gallons of unleaded gasoline, possessing 44 break horsepower and 34 foot pounds of torque at red line, and capable of maximum speeds in excess of 95mph.
Where in those stats do you see ANYTHING that tells you 'tow shit with this motorcycle'?! I've been looking, LOOKING A LOT, and I cannot find any fucking mention of 'tow a bunch of shit with this fucking motorcycle, you crazy maniac you'.
I spent tonightlast night dicking around with my turn signals. I was finalizing the placement of the turn signals I purchased to replace the ones I broke. I also relubed the axle and speedometer assembly. Then I tore apart the entire top of the bike to get at all the wiring so I could remove all the wiring taps that were used to power the now-defunct top box and the TOW HOOKUP that was zip-tied underneath my back fender.
YOU DO NOT USE A SINGLE CYLINDER DIRT BIKE TO TOW A FUCKING TRAILER! DUR-FUCKING-HEY BUY A GOLDWING! OR BETTER YET A CAR! HOLY SHITBALLS!
So... fine. Wiring taped up and secure. None of the tapped wires look ready to come apart, thankfully.
... I mean, Jesus Fucking Christ, the topbag tap was running right next to the battery. Just wire on a loop connector and run it directly off the battery! WHY did you decide to tap the main positive lead?! Why? WHY!? I can see having to tap the brake actuator light, but even then, I would have purchased a spare wiring rig for the back end and used the PLUG that was provided on the back of the bike that everything runs through! Make a three-way! don't cut open and dick with the wiring trunk, dip shit!
GAH!
And the wiring trunk itself is so... weak. On an aside someone came out with a 400w stator for this bike (stock is like 180w) to run more gadgets. One guy bought two or three and completely redid the wiring on the bikes he was using it on, upping the gauge and build quality. Dude was insane, total overkill. Bunch of other people bought one. All their stators burned out and died, his is still going.
Moral of the story? Don't try to run the world through 22 gauge copper. It'll burn shit up. It runs the bike and one big ticket item. If you want more, upgrade the plug/fuse/power system on the bike to give yourself more options as WELL as blade fuses (one upgrade I hope to do -someday-) without stressing the existing wiring.
.... oh god that accessory plug up front. Now I have to figure out how the geniuses wired THAT in. Probably with bubblegum.
Okay, soooo... I can't really afford food this week. I've got stores in the freezer I'll be eating through, though, so I'm not dead yet.
Still, it could be better. It's my own fault, though. I should have gone to the store last week instead of being lazy and mooching off others/eating subway.
Either way, for the past two weeks I've been unable to afford any booze. Anyone wanna donate a bottle of rum and some coke to the 'keep paco distracted this week' charity? A Fifth of Captain and you get to enjoy more of my hunchy goodness.
I've been committed to video... All I can do is look at that and say "gee I hunch over a lot" and "wow, I'm like an entire bag of unfunny falling down stone stairs, and everyone's cheering when they hear bones break." Most of the conversations I have with those three should be put to some sort of medium, even if it's player piano. ESPECIALLY player piano, because honestly, how can you get much better than that anyway? That's right you can't, don't try, not even with coffee in your ass.
That may be totally random but that's actually a bit of a play on the stuff that went on and was said before/after/during the Dylan Moran stuff. And AFTER I offered to go sex toy shopping with surreptitious and help her pick out something suitably purple, sparkly, and made of complete wrong that you would never want to stick in yourself or vise versa (don't ask me how I know) if only so I don't have to listen to her going on about not having one. Ordinarily I'd be all like "hur hur hur lemme watch" but this time, aside from the normal horrible commentary that springs to mind when I find myself contemplating a wall of android phalli which will soon be doing unspeakable things to someone I call friend, I'm just "here, take the hitachi (srsly, look it up, you could overthrow nations with that thing, and it still runs on 110, win win), take this overly long novel, and when I see the lights dim in the apartment complex I will know that I have helped." People who don't say I'm a philanthropist can all die in horrible ways, orgasms are gods gift to humanity and we must make sure everyone has ready access to them. Screw that 'world hunger' thing.
We saw a comedian last night, his name was Dylan Moran, he's Irish, and I'm pretty sure if I were to get within 30 yards of him I'd somehow become drunk through some sort of proximity effect. Stuff like this was causing me to hyperventilate. I don't know why except that it is HILARIOUS. He is everything I want to be, aloof, cultured, not angry at all, and funny when he's sloshed. He's a lot like an Irish version of Ron White. If only I could channel that power to not be a complete elephant testicle when I drink excessively, I'd be able to... drink a lot and tell jokes people like.
It's incredible when we try to wrap our minds around the concept of 'infinity', how woefully inadequate everything we come up with to express it becomes. Top scientists of astronomy disparaged looking at 'nothing' and were surprised to find galaxy after galaxy after galaxy staring back at them. It is humbling, yet fills me with joy to know there is so much out there, calling to us to explore it. Each night those of us blessed with a clear sky, bereft of interfering lights, can go out and look into infinity and know that we're only seeing our own proverbial back yard. If only we could look to the stars more, we could realize that it is a gift given to us by fate or God. It is our birthright to play among the stars, to explore and discover, race and war, to rise and fall, and spread ourselves among the planets and galaxies. It is a birthright that we have yet to grow into, yet to earn. I'm hopelessly optimistic sometimes, because I feel with every fiber of my being that our species will eventually earn that right.
There is space there, space for everything, everyone, and all our dreams and nightmares. Every person on the planet today could have a personal galaxy. Every person ever born could have one, a personal sandbox of billions of stars, one of which would take the entire lifetime of our all the members of our species, stacked one after another, to cross with our current technology. Everything we've ever conceived of exists within it, somewhere, and everything we can't understand or think of is in there too, waiting to be found.
And then, when you try to imagine that, someone comes along and tells you that light, time, space, the universe, and reality is merely just a dream and idea itself, a self imposed limit given by our minds and limited understanding. Just as we have broken all other barriers and limits set before us, so too shall we break these and look beyond them, and see even more.
That, my friends, is truly infinity, and it's ours.
.... oooooor I could be enjoying too much Guinness and we'll just all snuff out tomorrow when Jesus/Allah/Buddha rolls over on us.
Either way, I'll be (as far as I can tell) dead. But it really wants to make me take the next available weekend and go out into the middle of nowhere and stare up at the stars for a few hours.
Why is it EVERY SINGLE SONG I look up on youtube makes me ashamed to like the song?! Dude, you sneer like you're taking it up the butt that EXACT moment, and liking it a bit much.
... I DIDN'T NEED TO KNOW THAT FACE!
But it still stands. I have a motorcycle. A good one, too. And at a significant bargain, I think. Few bits to wrench on, but none of them functional, I just want to make some changes to make it my own.
I've never had one painted (or painted it myself) before... maybe I'll do that eventually. For now? Tank guards, methinks.
Wow... that was exactly NOT the night I needed to be unable to fall asleep. Responses will be sluggish. May be unintelligible. I'm going to try doing nothing except moderation duties until I get a nap.
After review... no, bike shop guy. I don't want your '08 Suzuki GSX650F, Sure, it's an inline four, but it's also 530lbs dry, and only puts out 85hp for a sport bike.
Point de 1: Too dang heavy. Nuff said. Point aba 2a: Don't want to have a GSXR-style bike, because then sport-riding jackasses would have to prove the massiveness of their idiot-balls by trying to race me, and I'd die because I'd probably be an idiot-dick and try to win. Bad enough dealing with cars. Pointe charlie: If I DID want a sport-styled I4 I'd save some coin and go for the just-over-7k Yamaha FZ6, a 450lb dry, 90hp half-faired bike with a long history and huge following, rather than your right-at-7k 75hp hunk-o-plastic with just enough name recognition in google to bring up all the bad user reviews of it. Old people like it, okay. Sure. But if I wanted a bike old people liked, I'd get a Triumph Bonneville or a BMW or (Hey!) V-Strom. Point Wappa: You're trying to charge me MSRP for an underperformer you can't move. Sorry, no. I don't even want to pay MSRP for the Strom.
So soon ready. I'm getting impatient and thinking of going for the Kawasaki EX650R, which I can afford now-right-now, rather than waiting for the V-Strom 650 ABS, which I can possibly afford not-now-next-month-maybe-month-later
Pros: More money to spend on gear, including new helmet. Paco needs new helmet. Not badly yet, but I'd rather it not break my nose/roll off if I go down. More money to spend on accessories, like frame sliders, bags/bag mounts, tools (TOOLS!), oil/filter for first change. Insurance not that high. Fits my needs.
Cons: Still sporty styled, but so is the Strom compared to a cruiser/scooter. Not as much option for baggage (though still plenty) No centerstand option(Okay yeah that would kinda suck, would have to get/make an external stand) Less off-road option. Fairing must be removed to change oil (a minor point, kind of) No ABS Not as much passenger room (supposedly? Have to check.)
Reality check: I didn't use the BMW to offroad/backroad that much. So getting a bike oriented to 'adventure touring' might not be necessary. It'd be nice to have the option, but is it $2k worth of nice? Besides, adventure is in the mind and the drive, people put street bikes through all kinds of hell, and it works. I'm not looking to single-track it, just go down some back/gravel roads and through some mountain switchbacks. 650r can do that easy. Bag options are plentiful and slimmer because of the exhaust position. I'd definitely like ABS, but it's still not prolific or cheap enough (kind of). Not being able to afford any new bits for the bike/me for months would kind of suck. Emptying out my savings would really really suck.
Definitely going to look at it Thursday. If I can find one under $6200... will probably go for it. I still keep looking at the KLR 650, too, oddly enough. It should be everything I don't want in a motorcycle, but I keep finding people riding them as commuters and as national touring mounts. Cheap, reliable, strong, versatile, with a huge huge following and thousands of sparkly/functional items for it. Since I don't want to go terribly fast and plan to go a few odd places, I keep turning back to look at it/consider it. The price is pretty amazing, too. Center stand available. No ABS, and more importantly no EFI... Buuuut...
Sweet. The problem PC is still up and running after 2 days straight, yay. eSATA controller or the PCI bridge or the drive itself is the problem. Boom shacka boom.
Meantime, work is so dead. The only person to call in misinterpreted my 'we charge $x for a diagnostic but if you decide to have us do the work we waive that' and hung up on me after yelling that she didn't want a diag, she wanted the work done. I tried to call back and explain to her how much of a fuckstain she was being, but she hung up again. So I went out and beat the holy fuck out of a shipping pallet with a claw hammer and busted up a bunch of old PVC pipe. Because it was either that or I destroy office equipment, or I go down the road to this persons house and just ram my car through their second story window, even if I had to build it on to the house first.
I. Hate. Customer. Service. Thankfully I don't have to do this too often.
So I have enough now to buy the motorcycle I want WITHOUT ABS... or insurance... or a new helmet... Aaaaallllmost there. Really coulda used a bonus this month. Stupid economy.
What sucks is the numbers I'm seeing will take 3-4 hours of dicking around to get BACK to, because they'll probably try to load up with 'extra' charges. Fair enough, I can do that. Spending my time researching while waiting on money.
When running windows the computer will randomly lock. Cannot get this damn system to lock on command. It's running Puppy and all it's tests no problem. Processor stress/benchmark tests, clear. Examining all the event manager logs after rebooting shows nothing. Windows is ticking along just fine one moment and then starting up the next. Usually there's SOMETHING. Write errors, read errors, memory errors, file errors, kernel errors, something. Nope. As far as windows knows everything was fine. Then it was starting up. This kept occurring after a fresh windows reinstall, too. Occurs randomly, too, so I can't say it's heat. Processor testing or memory testing would reveal it, too. Hard drive failure? Possible, but unusual that I can't get it to happen by scandisking, fdisking, disk mapping, formatting, etc. Running maxtor seatools utils currently. Memory tests keep coming up clear. Testing the hard drive comes up clear. Running long test at the moment.
I guess after this I'll pull the cd-roms and any other peripherals, I think there's still a disabled PCI network card.
Telling the 'client' currently that the best bet is to buy or obtain a new motherboard/processor/ram combo. Unless I find something unusual, I'll stick to that answer. Something random on the MB/RAM/CPU combo is interacting poorly. Probably wouldn't hurt to swap hard drives, too, cheap works.
It seems in my mind when it comes to alcohol that I equate 'smooth' with 'weak'. This is actually a pretty fucking horrible turn of events, especially because I know it isn't true. Yet my first sip reaction tonight was "huh, weak".
I've recently (read: tonight) purchased a bottle of rum. In honesty, thinking back on it, it's the first bottle of liquory juice that I've ever purchased in this new apartment (which is now 7 months old), so maybe I'm a bit out of sorts. I chow down on other peoples liquor often enough these days that I started to feel a bit bad about it and decided to buy my own. Enter a bag of ice, a bottle of coke, and this no name rum which was sold as "smoother than Captain Morgan's Spiced Rum." I was more than a little skeptical, what with loving the Captain on levels that cannot be described in movies with less than an NC-17 rating. I brought it home, pulled off the tape to reveal a plastic screw cap. 50 points from Gryffindor for that shit...
... I'm really ashamed I spelled Gryffindor correctly in the first attempt....
So I pour a bit in the nearest excuse for a shot glass I have, the 1/4 cup measuring cup. Good color and consistency, muted pleasant scent, sip and swish... wow. It's like lightly flavored water, easy and drinkable. I think to myself "all this 35% abv is probably at the bottom of the bottle, haha" and pour myself a good hunk of the bottle into one of my large glasses. Note that I purchased these glasses from Walmart where they were erroneously labeled "Vases". So, a bunch of ice, 1/4 of the glass of rum, 3/4 coke, and serve. I'm about 1/6th into the glass, and my face is starting to feel detached, a sure sign that it's working.
So, I guess "Isla De Rico Spiced Rum" gets a tentative thumbs up for the moment. Not only does it mix well, but it goes well straight. We'll see how the night progresses.
Classic Journey still rocks. Just FYI. I like it. I don't care who knows.
Also watching vid after vid of motorcycle crashes and idiots stunting on the streets with/without gear. "Yeah he has no insurance on it. He only made one payment on this bike. This thing's fucking ruined."
I've been busy the last few weeks dreaming and playing "Finance: The RPG". Got more than a few things going in the right direction, but still working out if it's 'right enough'.
I've wanted a motorcycle for a while, as you may well know. My last motorcycle was an inherited 1991 BMW r100gs that was too much maintenance to own, so I had to sell it. Before that I had a Kawasaki KLR 250 that I learned on. Kick-start-only dual-sport. Took it to Oklahoma on a lark, rode it to work and Dallas over and over, had every bike wreck I've ever had on it, the last one smashed up the bars real bad, took out the front rim, and pinched a fold in the tank.
Well, it's not dead, my parents still have it. After I signed it over as a 'downpayment' on the Beemer, I find that not only has the title NOT been changed over, but the bike has sat unused and unloved for years.
This... this cannot be tolerated. It also gives me something to do.
So it looks like every bonus check for now will be going towards bike parts. Already ordered a plastic tank for it. I need the tool kit, and then I'll begin pulling it apart and making a list of everything I need to buy.
So far I need: Front rim Both tires (90/10) Handlebars Tank (already ordered from IMS). AGM battery. Probably every single hose and gasket. Steel braided brake line. Back brake work (probably).
Coolant changout, perhaps some kind of de-scaling treatment for radiator. Sprockets/Chain. Toolkit (mine got ganked back in '03... Carb rebuild. Fork fluid changeout, perhaps rebuild/replacement. Back shock replacement, possibly. Oil/Filter. Electrics, knowing my luck. All the bearing grease. Clutch? Do those go out with time?
Figuring out the chain thing is going to be a bit of a bitch. Figuring out the fork thing is going to be a bitch. Rebuilding the carbs, greasing all the bearings... pretty much everything about this is going to be a bitch in heat. The only good thing I can think of so far is the fact that I'll get to start getting some decent aftermarket mods on it, put a Givi topbag on it, put some decent road tires on it, and start riding again for longer ranges.
Someone gave me legal absinthe-lite last night with melted sugar in it. How was it?
Guys. Don't shower for a week. Do funky stuff in the heat like work out and play football and stuff. Take a bunch of black licorice, melt it down in a microwave until it's liquid. Pour that hot waxy substance on your erect funky penis. Break your two lower ribs. Blow yourself.
THAT is what that drink tastes like. (Women will just have to imagine kissing the guy after he did that. He didn't brush his teeth for that week either.)
Yeah, Europeans are nuts. No amount of hallucinations or good writing would make me take that regularly.
Yet again, apathy is my anti-drug.
I'm rather amused however how I started with a margarita, moved on to the Hershey squirts of Willy Wonka, and 'came down' with a Kahlua and coffee. I think I want to buy one of those keychain breathalyzers, as my tolerance seems to be skyrocketing again.... that or I can stagger very convincingly in a straight line.
Thank goodness I've fallen out of the habit of checking Woot every day, else I'd have a 42" LCD(or plasma) 1080p computer monitor that doubles as a TV and no chance of motorcycle. But now it's sold out. Yay.
.... BAAAALLLLLLLLLLSSSSSSS. Money sucks.
Can I fucking go NOW!?! 1:40 left to go and I want... GUESS WHAT. MONEY. HAIRY MONKEY NUTS! TUPPERWARE-PRESERVED-DEER-DROPPINGS-BREAKFAST-YUMMY-YUM-YUM SHIIIIIIT. Shit shit shit shit *thud* zzzzzzzzz.
I'm going to become a hippy. The laziest hippy ever.
And apparently I'll be a paranoid hippy too. I just found Ground Zero II, a nuclear blast effect simulator to show you the thermal/pressure/fallout range effects you'd see from a nuclear explosion of x-size, with a slider at the bottom to choose which weapon. I just had fun trying to figure out how close to death I was if various yield warheads were to strike D/FW airport. It went from the supposedly active 6kt warhead made by N. Korea (which wouldn't even knock down the fence, it seems), to Tsar Bomba, the 50mt thermonuclear warhead that sent registered seismic shocks around the world three times (say goodbye to central Texas). I can tell you which one I'd rather be hit with if I had to survive a nuclear strike with no warning.
Every now and then I remap and revise where I'd run in the event of some sort of foreknowledge of an impending full-on nuclear attack, and for the Dallas area, there's a bunch of nowhere to run. On pretty much every point of the compass there's something strategically valuable between me and the next hope for civilization or even self-reliance. Ft Hood, Ft Sill, White Sands... There's something else west and east of here to consider, but I can't think of it. Unfortunately trying to cross west Texas to El Paso during the aftermath of a nuclear war would be suicide. If south-running fallout didn't get me the heat/distance would. East would be reasonable, though NOLA would be glassed, since it's a major major shipping hub, plenty of options around there, though, and a lot more fertile land. I'm pretty sure Mexico would have a 'shoot on sight' order for Norteamericanos when I got there if I went Big Bend way. Anyway....
45 minutes now. Yay... and our new guy broke someones special order toilet. That'll be fun to deal with on Monday. Great.
Go to party. check. Bring beer. check. Know NOBODY there. check. Get the business card of an amateur Elvis impersonator. check. Totally impress people with my ability to toss bottle rockets for mid-air launches. check. Decline the keg stand. Check. No, Paco. I know you can afford the bike on CL now, but I really don't think you'll be happy with an '83 gs750. Wait. wait wait wait. Save more, buy something new or lightly used outright. Couple more months, all the fall deals will start. You can do it.
Why should you watch so many news sources? So you can laugh at Madoff getting hundreds of years. Why should you regret watching so many news sources? 2 out of 3 going on about the Oxyclean guy.
Nice to know some of the UK staff are getting out of Iran and a partial recount is underway.
I was amused by their former CIA guy interview: "Well of COURSE we have people in there. Duh. We're not officially pushing for anything though. We're just watching." I'd be really surprised if someone wasn't, though. They're probably also recruiting to hell and back. Go CIA go.
I'm pretty sure everyone that's come to me after 2pm has done so with the express purpose to try to piss me off. It could be that I'm hungry or tired (hungry mostly, plenty of sleep last night), but I'd rather consider that it's a conspiracy between all our employees to jostle my flaps. Except trickykitty who continues to give me ammo, money, and medkits food, which is a self-contained conspiracy to break the karma-meter attached to my freeloading ass. I need to bake some brownies, it seems.
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the_paco's journal
That-A-Way
